I’ve been home for a week, and I’m miserably bored. I spent the first few days at home doing almost nothing other than missing my new friends from the trip. Then, I spent a couple of days doing things with people, many of whom I had known for years. Doing this both hurt and helped me. On the one hand, life as normal must absolutely continue, even following such an amazing experience. On the other, it made me feel distant and far away from everything that had just happened to me.

I know that the new friendships (and one of them is more than that) are not going away any time soon. It just feels like we were removed from each other so suddenly. Everything was going absolutely wonderfully at the time we all parted, and all of us, I think, are wishing that we had had more days with each other. It took six weeks for us to form a series of incredible relationships, some of which we never would have anticipated at the outset. We are all anxious to see where these relationships will go. As it stands, we have a week and a half left before we all converge in Minneapolis again.

My friends, it is likely that this will be my final entry for the trip. I have come a long way in the past five and a half weeks. What was once a journey that made me nervous is now a journey that I don’t want to stop. Indeed, I don’t want it to stop even though I’m completely physically exhausted (walking several miles to get home after a night with good friends for several nights in the week will do that to a person, I guess). Last night, while walking the long road home one last time, a French couple in a car stopped me and asked for directions. Even when exhausted, I could address them in French and point them in the right direction. If that’s not an indicator of my progress, I don’t know what is. I am now comfortable with the statement “I speak French,” because I do indeed.

It relieves me to know that not only has the trip made me better at French, but that it has imparted other crucial lessons as well, plus given me potentially lifelong friendships. I will cherish this experience as the coolest thing I’ve ever done for an undoubtedly long time.

My story here over the past five weeks has perhaps been somewhat strange. You all have gotten in your email what basically amouted to a stream of consciousness regarding my inner feelings. For the most part, the stories that have made this trip memorable have not appeared here. Those stories shall be told to you all in time in person, no doubt.

Hello everyone. I apologize for the relative lack of updates while I’m here in La Rochelle. I’m basically limited to a few times during the day for internet access. Now then, for some updates.

I’m really not worrying very much about the class aspect of the trip anymore. It’s all happened so much better than anything I could have hoped for. While I knew that French was a passion of mine before the trip started, I now know that it’s also a talent, and a powerful one at that.

We’ve basically been lounging on the beach a lot and doing homework for the past two and a half weeks. We did, however, go to Chenonceau and Amboise on Saturday. These castles in the Loire river valley are amazing to see. I did a scavenger hurt on Ile de Re with my French professor’s young son last Monday. He helped us find the things we were looking for, and it was great interacting with a French child.

Let me be honest, this trip is the coolest thing that I’ve ever done in my entire life. The people that are here with me are absolutely amazing, and we’re like a family. My French host family is wonderful as well. I cannot imagine how it’s going to feel coming home after all the spectacular things that have happened in the last month, and I still have a whole week and a half of memories yet to make. These sentiments are a far cry from how I felt at the beginning of the trip.

To top off all the great things that have happened, I’m also dating one of my friends from Minnesota. She’s great. :)

Now that I’ve had a week of classes, it’s possible for me to comment on the academic aspect of the trip.

I’m talented at French. I absorb new concepts easily, and the language flows easily through my mind when I communicate and when I read. I need to mention this at the outset because I have an amazing capacity to underestimate my talent and denigrate myself for no good reason. After a week of class, my own mortality, so to speak, has been made apparent. I might be talented, but I’m not perfect. The trouble is, I hold myself to such an unrealistic standard that every mistake feels like a personal failure. When I make a mistake in class, it feels like the other folks think I’m an idiot. The rational side of me knows that this isn’t at all true. Quite the contrary, the others often remark on how talented I am, being that I only started French two years ago. The teacher looks genuinely concerned when I remark on one mistake or another being stupid on my part, because she’s repeatedly remarked on how much I impress her.

My friends at home have often talked to me about how much I put myself down or stress myself out for no reason. The difference between home and here is that here I have an isolated environment to try to control this attitude. My friend Vanessa remarked to me yesterday on how much school seemed to be stressing me out, but told me not to apologize for it. She merely said that I’m very talented, and should recognize it.

Part of the negative feelings lately has been due, honestly, to a bit of homesickness. There are still three weeks of the trip left to go. It will probably go fast, but I still feel every bit of the distance between here and home, particularly when I look at the ocean. I’m sure everything will be better in a few days. It’s just that for now, I have to work on some of these insecurities that I have with my performance in the class. I’m one of the best students and speakers in there. There is no need for me to feel stressed out at all.

Alright, I have time for a longer post now. My host family is four people - two parents, Stephane and Isabelle, and their kids, Simon and Mathilde. All of them are sympa, as the French would say (nice). Simon, 14, plays a decent amount of video games; he’s got a PlayStation 2 and a PSP. We had him tell us which English swear words he knew, which was hilarious. Mathilde, 17, is super smart. She got a perfect score on the English part of her “bac” (the big test that all French students take at the end of high school). I have her bedroom while I’m here, and judging from her bookshelf, she reads in French and English.

Stephane builds boats for a living, but he told me that he was originally a butcher years ago when he was younger. He said that he likes to learn a new thing to do every so often, to keep things interesting. Isabelle is a “fonctionnaire,” or an employee of the state (there are a lot of these in France), and she in particular works for the regional government, not the national one. She works with issues of handicapped people now, but she used to work with the welfare system. I had a great discussion with her yesterday about this system after mentioning that I had learned a word regarding it in class. Apparently, the French have to sign contracts pledging to look for work or volunteer to receive welfare. I don’t think it’s like that everywhere at home. I told her that Obama wants more emphasis put on work when talking about the welfare system.

I met some of Stephane and Isabelle’s friends over the weekend. Claude and his wife, whose name I can’t remember, are an elderly couple who have a beautiful wine cellar, complete with sitting areas. Claude was nice enough to give me a bottle of wine that he had made himself. I also met Stephane’s brother, Christophe, who showed up at the house with his family. The French seem to place a huge value on conversation and their family/friends, because my host parents seem to know many people in the area and people will travel to the house just to talk for a bit. All conversation is accompanied by an “aperitif” (a strong drink of cognac or whiskey or something like that). They talk about all the same things that we do - old stories, local news, and especially politics.

The family generally has the same types of things that an American family would. I get my own bathroom to shower and wash up. There are no toilettes in the bathrooms, instead being located in separate WCs (water closets), and there are no screens on the windows. I had a great time trying to explain what a screen was to Isabelle. I think she got what I was telling her. Meals are only a little bit different. We had lasagna for dinner last night that Isabelle made. There is generally more seafood, like mussels, since we’re on the coast. There is also cheese at the end of the meal, followed by a dessert of fruit or yogurt. It’s overall quite satisfying. My friends in other families tell me that they’ve been drinking a lot of wine with their meals, especially the guys living with Mimi, the old lady that reminds me of my grandma. However, there isn’t a lot of wine with my family, probably because Simon and Mathilde are too young. I haven’t really asked about it yet though.

The school is a nice place, and my teacher, Frederique (a woman’s name here), is really nice. She clearly likes teaching French learners. She’s taking us out to Ile-de-Re, the offshore island here, for Bastille Day on Monday, so that will be a lot of fun. The city of La Rochelle is gorgeous, and is apparently the third most popular destination in France, after Paris and the Mont St. Michel (both of which I’ve been to now!). It’s clearly very old, with lots of old buildings and streets. I have to give a little presentation on La Rochelle’s history in class on the 23rd, so that should be interesting. I know the region figured somewhat prominently in the Wars of Religion here, so it’ll be interesting to find out. Hopefully I can get back to posting pictures on Flickr sometime soon. The local McDonalds has WiFi, so I might go there at some point (and to take a picture of a menu with Royal with Cheese on it).

Dr. Janc gave us our review for the test that will be on the Paris portion of the trip. It’s going to be slightly hard, but I’m not going to panic too much about it. The grades' values get stripped away when they transfer back to Marquette, so my plan is to study hard, but not fret. As for my French class here, I love it. Speaking French gets easier and easier for me every day, and the weakness of mine that I fret about most, oral comprehension, is getting much better. Tomorrow we have the first part of class in the market in the center of town, where we have to talk and ask questions to some of the merchants. It’s going to be a lot of fun. I have to interview a poissonnier, a fish salesman, and I plan on asking him how the recent fisherman’s strike affected his business.

Anyway, that’s all for now. I’m sure I’ll have more in the following days.

Hello everyone. Sorry I haven’t updated anyone in a while. I’m now moved in with my host family, but I’m having problems connecting to their wireless, so I haven’t jumped on their web connection yet. Fun fact - WiFi is pronounced “wee fee” in French.

Stéphane and Isabelle, my host parents, are really really nice. Stéphane looks a bit like Daniel Craig, and did a James Bond impression when I met him. They are amazed with how well I can speak French, after only two years of studying it. My teacher is too, for that matter. This makes me a bit self-conscious, and I’m trying to be humble about it. I just love speaking French.

Anyway, I’ve got class shortly, so I had better go. More later.

Hello everyone, sorry I haven’t given anyone an update in a few days, but I haven’t had much time. Don’t have much now, in fact. The web connection doesn’t work in my room, so I’m on someone else’s. I’ve gotta talk to the front desk about that (“madame, le web ne fonction plus!").

Anyway, real quick, some updates.

I’m warming up a little bit to my roommate. I still think he’s needlessly rude, but I suppose he’s a challenge placed before me by Providence. Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam, after all.

The curbs flush water into the streets from little spouts, to allow the street sweepers to clean. Genius.

The government of France controls when and how much the end of season sales are in many retail businesses. This is done to protect the small businessmen, because the large chains used to drop their prices extravagantly to push the small people out. This is brilliant. Walmart wouldn’t be the de facto ruler of America if we did this.

The churches here are grand beyond any conceivable measure that my American mind can muster. Each one makes me tear up. They are the most beautiful spaces that I’ve ever seen, conceived during a time when France was the greatest defender of the Catholic faith, built for the glory of God. Walking into many of them, one has a strong desire to fall to one’s knees. They are incredible, and I haven’t seen anywhere close to all of them.

I’m one of the strongest French speakers on this trip, or at least one of the most confident. I help people with what French folks are saying sometimes, and I can address French people at the drop of a hat. At first I felt like the French were condescending when you speak their language to them, but really, it’s simply that they can tell that you’re a foreigner. They do appreciate it when you speak to them in French. I carried out a transaction with a merchant completely in French today, with him giving me directions for how to treat the item I bought (a piece of art).

The group seems to think that I’m funny and a nice guy to have around. That, and being able to speak French pretty well makes me really feel essential to the group. That feels good. It mitigates the reality that I started out as an outsider, since everyone else is from Minnesota. I’ve made fast friends, and it’s a good time. One of the other guys, Mike, is an amazing conversationalist, and I think a couple of the girls have the same type of academic interests that I do. I’ve mingled with everyone though, traveling with one group at the end of the day and playing cards with another at night, etc.

The exchange rate sucks. I exchanged the $250 in American that I brought with me, and got 146 euros, with no fees or commissions. USA for the lose. 1 euro is about $1.65. I took out 100 euros yesterday, and nearly wept. That had to have been the entirety of my last little paycheck from the library.

The group didn’t seem as keen on speaking French among themselves at first, but they seem to be picking up more and more on the idea, which I think is cool. It really makes me glad, because I’m growing to love playing around with and speaking the language more and more the longer I’m here. I still do feel like an amateur next to the French, of course, but I suppose those are the ropes. I tried haggling with that artist that I mentioned earlier, but it didn’t work so well. Mark my words, as I get better, I’ll get more assertive.

Anyway, I love speaking French, I love seeing all the things that I’m seeing, and I like the group that I’m with. The one thing that gives me pause still is the amount of homesickness that I feel. I can’t think about home too often without getting a little sad. I’ll get through it though.

That’s all I’ve got for now. It’s late, and I’ve gotta get to bed.

I’m afraid that this first post is not going to be completely positive. I admit fully that these are the rantings of someone who is severely jet lagged, but I also know that Dr. Bolander wanted me to keep records of my thoughts as I was having them. So, here they are. I’ll put the positives in as well.

The flight to Minneapolis was wonderful. 1 hour, and that was it. The clouds sat around the plane like titanic sentinels of nature, keeping guard over the earth below. That’s my poetic thought for the day.

I met the group in Minneapolis in the process drinking at the bar nearest the gate. The flight to France seemed to take approximately 5000 hours. Once it was over, however, our prof made the decision to not let us rest at all and instead take us out into the city. Indeed, all of our rooms were not even ready for us, so we shoved all of our bags in one of them.

We went outside and started walking, and owing to them having been in my eyes for roughly 15 hours, I lost a damn contact lens that I had just taken from the package mere hours before getting on the first plane. Now I have only one set to last me for all of 6 weeks.

I’m going to have a roommate in La Rochelle, which I thought would be cool at first, but now that I’m interacting with him more, I’m not sure he likes me very much, and the feeling may be mutual. I really don’t want to be judgmental, and maybe this is just me being tired, so I’ll give it more time. I just feel like I’m making a big ass of myself. I’m completely exhausted, and everyone seems to be noticing how out of it I am, and this is their first impression of me. I’m probably just being insecure. My bonus is that I seem to speak French better, or at least more confidently, than many of them do. To be fair, everyone feels like crap and is a bit irritated because of it.

The real problem with me right now is that I’m lonely. When the plane was landing, I realized that this is the real deal. I have no way out. I feel completely trapped here with these unfamiliar people who might not like me with a language that I only marginally understand. The reality that I can’t see my family for six entire weeks is completely crushing my desire to see this through. Were I a more cowardly person, I’d want to come home right now.

Alright, enough of that crap. The reality is that this will get better. Tomorrow I’ll be rested (and, thank heaven, wearing fresh clothes), and the real trip begins. Besides, this thing isn’t that long, and there are plenty of people so far that I get along well with. More updates as I have them.

Nearly a dozen friends and professors, in addition to my parents, should be receiving this entry in their email today. If you’re reading this, welcome.

I’m about to set off on the longest, farthest journey away from home that I have ever taken. By the end of “today,” I’ll be in France. I have gone through several stages of fear and panic in the past week, but now it’s time to put those fears aside. If you’re reading this, you’re going to be on the journey with me for the next six weeks. And so, once again, in the words of Kennedy… “Let us begin."

For more of my content on the trip, make sure to visit flickr.com/photos/jo… for pictures from time to time, and twitter.com/joshbrez for my Twitter feed (micro-updates and musings).

Today’s the day that I finally leave Milwaukee for the whole summer. It’s been a completely boring three weeks here without neither classes nor most of my friends. Max and Elicia are coming to get me for a weekend of partying to celebrate their graduations. It’ll be a good time, and will remind me how much I have to look forward to a year from now, when that elusive degree will finally be mine.

After this weekend, I go home to Illinois again, there to stay for three weeks before going overseas. These next three weeks are going to be exceptionally nerve-wracking, when my nervousness about the trip catches up to me big time. I’m really uneasy about leaving behind my family, friends, university, and country for six entire weeks. It’s a frightening prospect. This is by far the most important thing I’ve done in my life up until now, as it will have a large impact on where I see my career going after undergrad. It’ll be a good time, but only if I can shed my doubts and insecurities. Time will tell if I can do that or not.

If I hold true to the values that I’ve been raised with and the knowledge that I’ve cultivated in college, while also remembering that there is much that I don’t not know, I’m sure that I can go into this experience with an open mind.

New site, mainly to keep people updated on my upcoming trip to France and how I feel about my first journey off the continent (I don’t count that trip to Hawaii that one time).

There’s obviously been a lot of talk in recent months about Iran’s desire to enrich uranium for the purposes of nuclear power. I honestly don’t see why the West is so afraid. Let me explain why.

First, it must be noted that Iran is a signatory to the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty of 1968 (NPT). Article II of this treaty states that no signatory State that does not possess nuclear weapons has the right to possess them, either through acquisition or production. With that fact in mind, however, Article IV of the same treaty makes it clear that any signatory State, regardless of whether or not it possesses nuclear weapons, has the right to research nuclear energy for peaceful purposes. Article III of the treaty provides that safeguards (in practice, the IAEA) are in place to ensure that no State without nuclear weapons is in violation of Article II, while not interfering with the rights guaranteed in Article IV. Okay, now that I’ve covered the relevant parts of the document, let’s look at the situation at hand.

Iran is enriching uranium, and claims to be doing so for the peaceful purpose of establishing a nuclear power station or stations. They have the legal right to do so under the NPT. That really cannot be disputed. The big fear, then, comes from the idea that Iran is trying to acquire nuclear weapons.

The problem with this idea, though, is that there doesn’t seem to be any real proof that Iran wants to possess nuclear weapons. I’m going to go out on a speculatory limb here and say that the leadership of Iran is not devoid of common sense. Right now, they are justifying their claim to nuclear energy with the NPT. If they built a nuclear weapon, they’d be in direct violation of that agreement. Even if they developed such a weapon in secret, they’d have to do one of two things with it: a) mount it on a warhead and launch it at a perceived aggressor (Israel), or b) more likely, declare to the world that they possess a nuclear weapon in an attempt to gain more political influence. Either one of these options, obviously, would show the United Nations that Iran willfully violated the NPT and is therefore deserving of retribution or sanctions.

There are three big situations or problems that I can see with my theory:

It could be argued that because Israel (most likely) possesses nuclear weapons (they have not ratified the NPT, which I find troublesome), it makes the Iranian leadership feel justified in having them. Even if such a situation were to come about, however, it would create a situation akin to the one existing between India and Pakistan. While this wouldn’t be an altogether good situation, it could lead to an increased desire for diplomacy with the Palestinian Authority on the part of Israel, given the threat of nukes on both sides. However, that still doesn’t change the fact that Iran would be subject to sanctions.

Another issue that would cause the United States concern is the possibility of Iran selling nuclear material to terrorist groups. Honestly, I think the original Bush Doctrine could be used justifiably here (i.e. we will make no distinction between terrorists and those who harbor them, NOT the idea that war can be started preemptively). I doubt the UN would have a problem with affecting sanctions on Iran, or destroying their nuclear facilities, should they do such a thing.

The third big problem that I can see is the assumption that other Middle Eastern nations will follow Iran’s lead in their desire for nuclear energy. Such a situation would obviously strain the IAEA’s ability to adequately regulate the situation, and create a host of countries that may or may not possess nuclear weapons. This scenario is the scariest, I think. If enough countries have nuclear weapons, what would they care about UN sanctions? They could start World War III in a heartbeat. The main defense against this scenario, however, is the fact that it’s a slippery slope argument, as there are currently no indications of such a thing happening.

Now, given that there seems to be adequate defense against these scenarios at the present point in time, I’d say we should continue to rely on negotiation, and allow Iran to do what they want, for now. Regardless of any crazy offhand statements their president makes about Israel, their Supreme Leader, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, issued a fatwa some months back declaring any stockpiling of nukes by Iran to be against Islamic law. Even if he didn’t have all of his facts straight (the US is decreasing its level of nuclear capability, not increasing it), I think his word should be taken as the final say on the matter from Iran.

We should keep watching, of course, but President Bush needs to take his finger off the trigger.

Sources: Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty of 1968 , Fatwa from Ayatollah Ali Khamenei